Leaving and exclusion

Again and again, we experience exclusion. People are excluded from certain spaces, others are locked up and excluded from participation in society in this way. Some are excluded through bullying based on different ideologies, opinions, morals, religions etc. Exclusion happens when human beings and animals are deprived of freedom, when money is withheld, or equal access to opportunities is denied.  Exclusion is usually considered something negative, in contrast to integration. However, it is important to set boundaries, especially to protect ourselves. In winter, we exclude the cold, we exclude certain foods, animals and other people who could harm us. Every landlord knows that they sometimes need to exclude certain people to keep order in their pub or eatery. Naturally, we leave everything that harms us. Unfortunately, people are not very good at feeling and setting boundaries, which is why we still build fences, walls and borders and fight wars in relation to these boundaries. We often exlcude the whole person if we’re bothered by one behaviour. If we learn to set loving and respectful boundaries, we will have a lot less problems. When a person behaves in a way that hurts me, I don’t have to call them an idiot or report them. I can also negotiate with him or her. I can get to the bottom of the situation with the other person, explain what bothered or hurt me. I can ask the other person what they wanted or what they need.  When we agree in this way, we don’t need to exclude each other any more. There are families, groups and societies in which noone is excluded, weak or extraordinary people are accepted and loved there. This love is not tied to conditions, but to the fact of existence. Everyone who exists has a right to live. There are families who are totally broken because everyone fights each other and wants to change each other. How do these differences come about? Broken families, groups and societies try to make people conform and those who do not conform are excluded. These people believe: if another person does not think the same way as I think, they cannot be my friends, if people do not share the same faith, vote for the same party or support the same football club, they cannot be my friends. People who recognise that it isn’t worth pursuing a world where all people are the same can accept others, listen to different opinions, understand others’ fate and their life experiences. Exlusions into rich and poor, popular and unpopular are no longer required.  When we learn that there are natural boundaries and accept them, we no longer need the artificial boundaries. Diversity is healthy, both in nature and in human interaction.

I wish you a very good new week

Gertrud Müller